E-Rs FRUSTRATION FINDING A HIGH SPEED ISP

I need to rant. We just moved to a new city. Naturally, my first impulse is to find out what my broadband options are. So, I head on over to broadbandreports.com to see what's available in my area.

I type in my zip code. I get a report that reads like stereo instructions. Practically useless.

So, I see a link for "prequalification. See what I can get?" Cool, I think, that should help. I click on it.

It asks me for zip (good), address (good), phone (not so good since we haven't gotten a phone yet).

I try and skip it. NO JOY. Error message. Go back and put in a phoney one ... and I get STEREO INSTRUCTIONS! It's totally useless. Well, not really. But when I click on click on oneI get so many pricing plans my head spins! I don't even know if it's available to me?! And it's in a grid which is with an alien language that's foreign to me.

Call Earthlink DSL. Can't service me. Drag. SBC/Yahoo ... no joy. Which shocks me, as I thought they were the equivalent of the digital StarBucks when it comes to internet service.

Call COMCAST. Stupid computer routes me to tech support instead of sales. They can't transfer me. Have to call back. Call back. GET HUNG UP ON after I say I'm not a cable TV customer! (I have DirecTV).

So, call Time-Warner Cable. They help. Alas. They don't service me, Comcast does. But, they are able to forward me to a human being. But when I get quoted, I decide that I am not willing to part with my left arm and leg each month ($56?!). Come on, guys. In a world where DSL is less than $25 a month, you guys are really behind the power curve - I don't care how many times you claim you're faster than DSL.

And DSL Extreme can't help me at all unless I give them a phone number which I don't have since I just moved here! Are you telling me that I have to get a phone just to see if you can service it?

SIGH. At least I can enjoy a Hotspot at StarBucks. Or, I can always backslide into the hell that is AOL.

Seriously, there has to be a better way.